The Ones Who Stay Friends

This blog may come off as a bit controversial, and some may disagree, but the reality is when you go abroad you will end up facing language barriers. No matter how much of a language you have studied in the classroom it will happen. Unless you grew up speaking it or have been learning for years and years, it will happen. It happened to me a lot with my roommates, with professors, and the locals. You still have the potential to become friends with these people, but from my experience I have found that the lasting friendships are the ones with whom you can actually communicate with to me, this meant stringing more than just a sentence or two together. It is stressful when you can only communicate a sentence or two at a time with a dictionary.


For me, my closest friends wound up being the ones who spoke English. In reality that’s how it goes, if you cannot communicate by language, it is much harder to form a solid bond with someone, because you can’t really learn their likes, dislikes interests, etc. While it is possible to form friendships with those that you experience a severe language barrier with, it is not the easiest thing, it takes a great deal more patience, so the majority of my closest friends spoke a decent amount of English.

On the flipside, those that I faced the language barriers with also taught me the most in the way of new words. Those that knew English wanted to speak English with me,which was sometimes frustrating when I was trying to learn Russian. So, those that I faced the language barriers with were some of the better teachers because I had to learn Russian to communicate with them.

I did have one good friend, Elena, who was born in Siberia. She was teaching herself English, and she was pretty good at it. I helped her with English, and in turn she helped me with my Russian. I think I learned the most from her. And as a result of learning languages together we became friends that way, and we still talk. I will try to send her something in Russian and she corrects it, while she sends me something in English to correct.

My friend, Elena

Vera's Roomates

I met Vera’s roommates who also spoke English. Both of their names were Maria. Now keep in mind, that Russians have about 10 names in their vocabulary, so you will meet about 50 people with the same first name. So I called one roommate Masha, which is a nickname for Maria sort of like Patty or Trisha for Patricia. Maria, the other one, was from Azerbaijan and knew how to speak three or four other languages. I had tea with them all. Over the course of the semester, the girls took me all over the place. I got to see a dance festival with people from all over the caucus regions performing native dances; Maria performed one of her own. It was fascinating; there was even a dancer from as far away as India. I think she was an exchange student as well. We went shopping, went to the movies and just hung out and had tea. These three were definitely my closest friends during my stay, especially Vera.

Vera

It was around the first week in October when I met Vera. I’d come back from morning classes and was taking a nap when a knock on the door woke me up… I wasn’t too happy. I answered the door in my paint covered, two sizes too large green t-shirt, blue pants and barefoot, not to mention my hair was a mess. I must’ve been a sight. Anyway, there she was. She introduced herself, handed me an index card with her phone number and room number on it. I think she understood that I was a little confused. She told me that a professor in the international department had mentioned that I was all alone here, meaning I was the only female among three other guys in my group, and the professor thought I could use a friend. She told me if there was anything I needed to call her or stop by. A few days later I did that. She seemed like a nice person and my gut instinct was correct, she became one of my closest friends.

classes

At Volgu, all classes were in one building. This was quite a change from Mansfield, which has several classroom buildings. There were 4-5 floors in the building, which had classrooms, the stolovaya (cafeteria), library, computer labs, little food shops, and an ATM machine.
There were no elevators and the bathrooms had no soap or toilet paper. I learned quickly to bring tissues and hand sanitizer with me to class every day, or just “hold it” until I got back to the dormitory.
Anyway, Cody Ryan and I had all the same classes. We had 1-2 per day and they were about 90-minutes long. We had some classes with students from Kent State University in Ohio and a couple of girls from Belgium. The majority of our classes were in English, with the exception of phonetics, in which I was completely lost in from day one. This was my least favorite course.
We also took two Language courses, I felt like I was in high school Spanish class all over again, where it took me 2-3 hours a night to study vocabulary, and to this day I do not understand verb conjugations, in any language.
We had a political science course with Professor whose nickname was Misha. I thought that he was British when we first met, because he had a flawless accent. It wasn’t until after I learned his name that I figured out that he wasn’t. Great guy, with a Monty python- esque sense of humor. This was my favorite class.
We also took classes in history multi-cultural literature and geography. Our course load totaled about six or seven classes. The credits actually transferred back to Mansfield, and we got to choose the equivalents to MU classes. I already had my language requirements met before I went over, but as a result of going to Russia, I have double the credits for it. If I would have known that I’d be doing this back in high school, I would have saved myself the misery of taking an AP Spanish class.

main campus building from my dorm room window.

Arriving at Volgograd State University,

The group reached Volgograd a week after leaving New York. Our dorm was this massive structure that stood 14 stories high. Quite a change from the Mansfield dorms.

The dorm rooms were laid out like apartments. There were two bedrooms, one with three beds the other with two.  I had one roommate in the room with me, her name was Olga, she was a nice person, but didn't speak a lot of English, and my neighbor Zhenya who lived in the room over from me alone. We had a little foyer for our shoes and whatnot and a shower room. The show was separate from the room with the toilet. Apparently Europeans find it disgusting to take a shower in the same room that you take a dump. Really, who can blame them?

Train ride from St Petersburg to Volgograd

Up until this point, I hadn’t experienced much in the way of culture shock. I had my first experience with language barriers on the train.  The traveling time was a little over 30 hours. It was the end of august, so it was hot and there was no air conditioning in our cabins. The cabins in my section of the train or “cheap seats” were about the size of a walk in closet. There were four cushioned platforms that served as benches and our beds. Anyway the cabin was full. There was me, Ryan and two Russian guys, neither  spoke English. This is where things become awkward. I was in a hot tiny room with three other guys. Ryan and I didn’t speak Russian and our cabin mates didn’t speak English. Here I was face to face with an old man, I had my little phrase book out and I was trying to figure out what to say to him. I left the room for dinner and came back a couple of hours later for bed. The next morning he offered Ryan and I coffee. I learned quickly that there are ways around language barriers. For one thing there is body language, things such as pointing and making gestures was reminiscent of a game of charades. I felt dumb communicating like this, but it was effective. The old man’s name was Yuri, that afternoon into evening though the charades- like conversation and the help of my phrasebook I learned that he was on a fishing trip and was heading to the Volgograd region.The last night on the train was probably the most fun, a large group of other guests and staff congreagated into our room. It is one expirience i won't forget. 

                                                         Some of the group in our cabin. Yuri is the Man in front of me with the white tank top.

A few of my favorite things(Russian Dishes)

1. Blini ( Blee- nee) is a very thin pancake similar to the French crepe. Popular ways to eat them are with condensed milk, jam, sour cream or honey.

(Blini with condensed milk)

2. Pelmeni – (pee-yell- mee- nee) (Pee-yell- men, plural) This was similar to ravioli or dumpling. They’re usually made from flour, water, egg and some kind of filling, usually meat or vegetable. The most common way to eat them, at least what I ate, had a beef filling and a side of either mayonnaise or sour cream.

(Pelmeni)photo courtesy of google images

3. Borsch(more ukrainian origin) and Schi (shee). These two soups are similar. The main difference would be that Borsch has beetroot added to the recipe. “Borsch” simply means beet soup. Shi on the other hand is cabbage soup, and there are no beets in it. Ingredients for both soups usually include a pork or beef broth, cabbage, onions, carrots, and potatoes.

Borsch ^ courtesy of google images

                                        Schi^ courtesy of google images.

St Petersburg

St. Petersburg aka “Venice of the North” is in Northern Russia along the Baltic Sea. The city is a collage of old palaces and other historic buildings. Our group took a boat ride down the Neva River and visited the hermitage (winter palace), which is now an art gallery and museum. We also walked around the city all day. I was on the hunt for the typical Russian nesting dolls or Matryoshka.  They were extremely expensive so I decided to wait.

The day of the trip, the flight, and arrival

I got up at 5 in the morning to drive with my father down to Mansfield, so I could meet up with the rest of the group that was traveling with me. The drive from Mansfield to JFK was four hours, along the way the professor who drove us down, Dr. Bosworth, was giving all sorts of warnings and information as to what to expect. He told us to avoid Banya’s. To this day I’m still unsure as to what a Banya is. He also explained some of the differences between the cultures. For instance, women don’t wear sneakers, and go to much greater lengths for their appearance and that they get dressed up to go to the supermarket. Little did we know that the adventure had just begun.
Our flight was from JFK to Helsinki Finland, the flight itself was interesting in that you experience a full 24 hours in about eight. We left New York at about 6 p.m. and flew over the ocean. Watching the sunset from 30,000 feet is equivalent to a rainbow. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything more beautiful. Than another hour passed and it was dark. Then we reached daylight again a few hours later. Imagine what this does your biological clock.
Sitting for 8 hours straight is about the equivalent of being stuck in a car all day. You’re tired, crampy etc. I learned something the hard way, it is important to get up every couple of hours while at 30,000 feet just to walk around. It keeps the circulation in your legs going. I didn’t do this and then wound up with crippling muscle spasms in my calves. We arrived in Helsinki about 11a.m. their time, my clock was set to 2-3 a.m. US time. The exhaustion that settles in is jet lag. By the time we got to St. Petersburg all I wanted to do was sleep and I did- for 13 hours.

The above photo was my room in the international Hostel. There were 6 beds and it was located right in the heart of St Peters burg.